“117 Hours Before” #WIPpet Wednesday 8/9


My Anna will be having surgery on 8/7 which includes an overnight hospital stay, so I’m scheduling this WIPpet early. Needless to say, I’ll be playing nurse Jeanne when this post appears.

EARLY 8/9 UPDATE: She’s home, dozing in her recliner, and eating soft foods. The staples come out next week and after that, it’s all a matter of healing.

I’m very thankful things went as well as they did.

This week’s WIPpet Wednesday comes again from Surrogate: Traditions, the third novel in the Surrogate Series.

Here’s my WIPpet math for 8/9/2017:

8×9=72, 72+201= 273, 273+7=280 words from Chapter Seven “117 Hours Before” with enough added to complete the sentence.

A note about the Panpobal: The Panpobal are an intelligent insectoid species native to Etain’s home world, Gno’. They arrived on Takran when Etain did (through no fault of Etain’s) and have established themselves without substantial damage to the ecosystem. (and they’ve helped to rectify the damage since learning of the problem) Theirs is a matriarchy which recognizes Etain as a queen, because they can smell the small part of her genetics that is Panpobal. (a result of Alyward genetic tinkering)

A note on the Panpobal language: The Panpobal speak, or rather, click, in binary, zeros and ones, on and off. They use pheromones and vary the speed if their clicks to emphasize their “words.”  This is why their sentences seem choppy. We only understand the Panpobal because Etain does.

The setup: A mysterious illness is killing eight out of ten Humans on Takran, and Etain’s children, save for one, are half-human. Mateo, also Human, has gone with them to New Slydrra Za in hopes of staying clear of the virus. Etain, however, has remained at the palace, and is being visited by Panpobal representatives who are concerned about her safety.

     “Sent to see.” A young Panpobal queen and a hundred workers stood on Etain’s desk. “Queen Etain not in court. Must see if all good.” She danced across the desk top as she looked around the apartment, her workers making way as she moved. “All not good. Much worry.”

     “Yes, much worry,” clicked Etain. She looked around the apartment too, at the quiet, at the—  “Sickness.”

     “Human sickness.” The small queen climbed Etain’s arm to stand on her shoulder. At just over a hand long, she was too young to have molted, which meant she’d never laid eggs— a virgin queen who’d someday be mother to thousands. “Many sick. Many die.”

     “Not here, yet.” Etain shivered when the young queen brushed her antennae across her neck.

     “Good. You safe. Humans not.” The Panpobal queen jumped from Etain’s shoulder to the desk, where her workers caught her and set her gently down. “How help?”

     “Not know yet.” My children are gone, the palace is locked down. I only know sunrise by the clocks, but everything’s well, considering. She’s talked to her children and Mateo twice in the last three days. No one had become ill in New Slydrra Za or the palace.

     “What tell our sisters?” clicked the young queen.

     “Come often.” Etain looked across the room to where Stra paced in front of the shuttered windows. “See if need help.”

     “Not enough. We do this.” The small queen waved her antennae at the workers. “Some stay. You feed. Send if need help.”

     “Yes, I feed.” Etain watched as ten workers peeled from the group and bowed before her. “Send ten more to my male. New Slydrra Za.”

Catch up on the other Surrogate: Traditions WIPpet Wednesday posts HERE.

*WIPpet Wednesday is a blog hop hosted by Emily Wrayburn wherein writers share excerpts of their latest WIP. All genres and levels of accomplishment are welcome. The only stipulation is that the excerpt must coincide with the date in some manner. For example, on 10/8/14 you might share 10 lines from page 8, 8 paragraphs from chapter 14, or perhaps 18 sentences by doing WIPpet math and adding the day to the month. We’re flexible like that.


  1. I’m going to agree about the world building. It feels seamless, like there aren’t pages and pages explaining it in depth. It’s just part of what we pick up as we read the story. Although, now that I’m so far into the first one, I wonder how much I should read of the snippets because of spoilers, LOL.


    • Lol. I hadn’t thought about that one for you. Hmm. I’m doing the basic world building in these snippets that is more detailed in the first novel. And I don’t do page after page of description because it gets boring…even to me. I like to thrust my characters (and readers) into the world and let them figure things out as they go. (which you’ve probably already guessed)

      Some readers don’t like it at all. They want to be told, not shown. They want it all laid out on a nice explanatory platter, which, again, I find boring.

      If you want to want to skip a few WIPpets and Snippets until you finish, I understand completely. And I am thoroughly looking forward to hearing from you afterward. Pretty please.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, I’ll definitely be reviewing this one. 🙂

        I much prefer to be thrown in the deep end, as it were. I like feeling as though I’m propelled right into the world and learning along with the MC about what’s up.

        I’m hoping that it’ll only take me one or two more snippets at most before I’m done. I suppose I’ll decide at the next one whether I’m close enough to done to read the snippet.


  2. I third the great world-building compliment! I’m glad you do just throw us in there (I’ve never got past the first few pages of a Tolkien novel because of the tell-tell-tell).

    The Panpobal fascinate me. I could read whole stories about their culture alone.


    • The Panpobal are in and out of the series but are much more prevalent in the third novel. Thanks for the feedback. And a story with them… hmm. There’s an idea.


  3. I absolutely agree with everyone else about the amazing world building! It’s very interesting to read about the Panpobal species. It seems like you’ve thought a lot about them. You even know their language and their political system 🙂

    Seems like Etain and her family are in a dire situation right now because of the illness. I am intrigued about what happens next!

    Best wishes for Anna. Glad to know that she is recovering 🙂


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